Wetin Lawyers Dey Do Sef?!

LPPC Strips SAN Of Title Over Legal Misconduct
Lawyers' wig

Only Learned Friends Understand That;

1. Lawyers don’t “correct” pleadings; They amend them.

2. Lawyers don’t merely “think”(Who cares what you think anyway?); They opine.

3. Lawyers don’t “outline” remedies or issues; They adumbrate them.

4. Lawyers don’t “suggest” to court; They submit.

5. Lawyers don’t “lie”; They misguide the audience

6. Lawyers don’t “support” with evidence; they corroborate it.

7. Lawyers don’t “show” in court; They demonstrate.

8. Lawyers don’t “say” anything; They aver.

9. Lawyers don’t “disagree with a fact”; They contend it.

10. Lawyers don’t “finish submitting”; They rest their case.

11. Lawyers don’t use the word “understand”; They use “construe”.

12. Lawyers don’t “agree with other people’s opinions” ; They concur with them.

13. Lawyers don’t “investigate”; They probe.

14. Lawyers don’t “disagree with other people’s opinions”; They dissent from them.

15. Lawyers don’t “ask for permission”; They seek leave.

16. Lawyers don’t “fall sick”; They get indisposed.

17. Lawyers don’t “ask court”; They pray.

18. Lawyers don’t “bribe judicial officers” HELL NO They facilitate them.

19. Lawyers don’t ask court to  “postpone cases”; They ask it to adjourn them.

20. Lawyers don’t “find solutions”; They seek remedies.

21. Lawyers “know” everything; what you think they don’t know is “what they have not addressed their minds to”.

22. Lawyers don’t “go on” ; They proceed.

23. Lawyers don’t “refuse”; They object.

24. Lawyers don’t “ask court to take a step”; They move it.

25. Lawyers don’t “leave an issue”; They abandon it.

26. Lawyers are not “wordy”; They articulate their point.

27. Lawyers don’t “find solutions”; They resolve issues.

28. Lawyers call themselves #lawyers among “lay men”(all other professions and non professionals); They call themselves “Learned Friends” when they are addressing themselves.

29. Lawyers don’t “disagree” with each other; They just differ.

30. Lawyers don’t “seek help” from court; They seek redress.

31. Lawyers don’t “speak” in court; They address court.

32. Lawyers don’t “agree” to what someone has said; They associate themselves with it.

33. Lawyers don’t say something is “irrelevant or useless”; They say it is immaterial.

34. Lawyers don’t “arrive” in court; They enter appearance.

35. Lawyers don’t “go” to a judge; They appear before him or her.

36. Lawyers don’t “die” They relocate to God’s domicile

37. Lawyers don’t get “late”; They delay.

38. Lawyers don’t “disagree” with somebody’s opinion; They dissociate themselves from it.

39. Lawyers don’t “stand in for” anyone; They hold brief for them.

40. Lawyers don’t go for a “short call”; They take a leak

41. Lawyers don’t ask court to “force”;They ask it to compel.

42. Lawyers don’t say something is “the same”; They say it is parimateria.

43. Lawyers don’t say someone is “responsible”; They say he/she is liable.

44. Lawyers don’t “explain” what they have said; They substantiate it.

45. Lawyers don’t “tell lies”; They amend the facts.


Happy 2⃣0⃣1⃣8⃣ to u all my learned brothers and sisters.


*Author Unknown*

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